Breaking Stasis
by Skateaway
Summary: Jayne knows what to do when a job goes south; take the cargo and run. But what happens when the cargo is a certain silver cryo box? Alternate universe, Rayne.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Breaking Stasis

Disclaimer: I own nothing

A/N: My first firefly fic and my first fic in a looooooooooong time! Constructive criticism appreciated and reviews welcomed!

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Jayne woke to the klaxons blaring through the ship and was so startled he almost fell out of his bunk. His hand went immediately to Lux who had been laid carefully at the small table by his head and he sat up trying to shake off the fog and grogginess of sleep. The alarm continued to bellow and it was enough to remind him that he needed to get moving, and fast. It wasn't the automated Mandarin and English recorded spiel which meant that someone had hit the actual big red alarm button on the bridge. The you-are-so-humped-no-seriously-the-shit-has-hit-th e-fucking-fan-put-your head-between-your-knees-and-kiss-your-ass-goodbye big red alarm button. Jayne had only heard it once before when the ship he had been on had been boarded by pirates – well, other pirates anyway.

Cursing a blue streak under his breath Jayne got to his feet and immediately started weaponing up, thankful he had decided to sleep in his clothes last night. He had a bad feeling about this job from the start, ever since Roscoe had pitched it to him on that space station. He had pulled a string of jobs with Roscoe a couple years back and had a lot of respect for the man. Roscoe was a mean shot, a fun drunk, and about as loyal as they came out here in the black. Unfortunately, the man also had about the same sense of self-preservation as a bucket of piss. Coming from Jayne that meant a lot, but a man didn't get to be as old as he was in his trade without at least a shred of risk aversion. Roscoe had none. High risk and high reward. Jayne had thought he had put those days behind him, but when Roscoe had approached him all he could see was the money that this job promised. "Got stupid, you gorram dumbass," he muttered to himself as he slung Vera onto his back. He was wasting precious seconds strapping on his guns, but if they really were boarded odds were he would have to shoot his way out of it. As an afterthought he picked up his big, heavy coat, the only other piece of clothing he'd brought with him, and tied it around his waist. Luck favored the prepared.

Stepping to the door of his bunk he listened intently for a couple of minutes. Couldn't hear a thing, which probably meant the _hundans_ were on the other end of the ship and had boarded through the main hatch underneath the cockpit and not through the cargo bay. Course it was hard to hear anything through about four inches of solid steel, too. He gritted his teeth and slapped the disengage on the lock to his bunk, sending a silent prayer to whatever God would take him. With entirely too much noise the door opened and Jayne could now hear the sound of gun shots far down the crew hall by the cockpit, punctured by the occasional yell and scream. Without even realizing it he let out the breath he had been holding. Gunfire and shouts he could take; blind panic and cries of terror were another thing. That meant no Reavers then.

If they weren't Reavers then Jayne would bet all of his credits that it was Alliance. Roscoe had warrants out for him on most of the planets in the system and unlike Jayne didn't just stick to the Rim. This latest job had taken them right to Ariel, right to the center of the Core planets. Someone must've recognized them on the job and turned them in to the Feds. _Daxiang baozhashi de la duzi! _When the money was too good he always got stupid. He should've stayed with his last crew. Had his own bunk and everything, plus 10%. He'd only been with them for a couple of months before he had left to join up with Roscoe, but it had been enough to know that it was a shiny gig. Full run of the kitchen and no one trying to shoot him in the back. Well, if wishes were horses. He grunted to himself and cautiously sidestepped into the hallway, bringing Lux up as he moved.

For the first time on the whole job he was glad he was in the last crew bunk. As a last minute addition to the crew Jayne had gotten the bunk furthest from the kitchen and the head, which meant he was also closest to the cargo bay and the escape pods. If he could just get to the escape pods he would be home free. He'd never flown one before, but he knew they were close to Persephone when he'd gone to bed. With a little luck he could pilot that baby down to the planet. Hell, anything was better than sitting here waiting for some damn soldier to cure him of his indecision. He'd rather burn up in atmo then get caught by the Feds.

Walking backwards he kept his gun at the ready and his eyes on the entrance to the crew hallway far down the end of the ship. When he could finally turn a corner and get something between himself and those that were real keen on shooting him he turned on his heel and ran the rest of the way to the blessedly empty cargo bay. Charging through the bay he had almost reached the doors of the escape pod before something caught his eye and he jerked to a halt.

That gorram silver box. That gorram silver box that had been the whole reason they had stopped on Ariel, the whole reason Jayne had been hired on. Roscoe was making cashy money delivering this box and he had wanted someone with him who could keep his mouth shut. Apparently his own men had a bad habit of running their mouths and Roscoe had wanted this one played close to the vest. Roscoe had been paid half his take just to pick up this box on Ariel with the other half coming to him upon delivery in Boros. Even Jayne didn't know where the drop was on Boros, but he knew that was their eventual destination. Stopping off at Persephone was just a distraction, a way to throw anyone who happened to be following off of their scent. Guess it hadn't worked to well.

Jayne stopped in front of the box, running his fingers along the controls on the bottom. The shooting and shouts could still be heard echoing down the hallway; Roscoe was as good as dead at this point. If he weren't dead already, Jayne reasoned to himself. No reason to leave something so valuable here just for the damn Feds to get their grubby hands on. Too bad the box was so damn heavy. Jayne had helped to carry it on board and stow it away; he knew he'd never be able to drag the entire thing over to the pod in time. He was going to have to open the thing up.

His eyes lit up as he fiddled with the controls trying to find the right combination to open the stubborn thing. Soon as they picked up the cargo he had been constantly wondering what was in there. Discretion was standard protocol as a merc, but it didn't mean he stopped being curious. Whatever was in there was worth a lot of credits. Could be anything. Could be gems and gold bars (thought it hadn't really been _that_ heavy), could be some kind of high tech electronic _go se _that the Core folk were so dependent on. But Jayne was really hoping it was some kind of weapon. Some new gun, maybe, that could rival Vera. Military was doing all kinds of flashy things with grenades now too; what he wouldn't give to get his hands on a couple dozen. Hell, he'd just read an article in one of his gun mags about a new rocket launcher that was still in the development stage. Now that would be all manner of shiny.

The box made a sudden noise and seemed to shake a little, like it was releasing pressure. Jayne lifted the handle to raise the lid of the box off. A waft of cloudy air rose up and he turned his head slightly as a sour, acidic scent hit his nostrils. With one final shove he managed to take the entire top of the box off and leaned in through the haze to finally see inside.

Huh.

It was a girl. She was all curled like a baby and naked as one too, looking for all the world like she was sound asleep. But something clicked in the back of Jayne's mind; he'd seen this before. This was a damn cryo box. She was the cargo.

_Shensheng de gaowan_ if this wasn't even better than a rocket launcher! He looked down appreciatively as the cloud cleared and he was able to see her better. Long brown hair, longer legs, and a pretty pair of tits half hidden by her curled arms. She was young then, but definitely a woman.

The gun fire was definitely getting closer. Those Feds must've had a real grudge against Roscoe if they were tearing apart the whole ship like this. Recognizing he was losing precious time he began to reach down into the box to grab her arm and pull her out.

Like a shot her head sprang up, her long hair whipping behind her as she stared around the bay with unseeing eyes. She screamed, panic and terror reverberating through the entire hold like some kind of giant bell. One more good yell like that and she'd have the Alliance around their ears in no time. The girl was shivering something fierce and Jayne stepped back with a start as she started to pull herself out of the box and tumbled to the floor. Her shaking hadn't stopped and she curled up on the floor against the edge of the box, just has she had inside of it.

Jayne had seen people come out of cryo before and even though he had known what to expect she had certainly given him a shock. She seemed to be taking it harder than most and he couldn't help but appreciate what all the shaking was doing to certain portions of her anatomy. He bent down to her level and grabbed her shoulders to steady her. There was no time for him to be gawking and sure as hell no time for her to be having some kind of hissy fit. As soon as he touched her skin, even real lightly, her head snapped up and she started on that screaming again, shrieking like he was cutting on her or something. He took one hand off of her shoulder to cover her mouth as fast as he could to muffle her. She still screamed around his hand, but she didn't even struggle. Her eyes had finally started to focus and she looked up at Jayne with complete and utter fear. Made him a mite uncomfortable to see a girl looking at him like that. He was plenty used to seeing that expression on men's faces before he shot them or robbed them blind. Hell, he even liked seeing it. Meant he was in control, that he was on top. But this was something else entirely.

"_Ta ma de_, girlie, can't keep hollering like that," he hissed to her through gritted teeth.

She didn't say nothing back, just stared at him with those wide brown eyes that kind of trembled. Finally stopped yelling though, at least.

"Listen, I ain't gonna hurt you or nothing. Just trying to get us off this ship. You understanding me?"

She nodded hesitantly. It was a little eerie; Jayne kind of got the notion that she was seeing right through him.

"If I let go of you, you ain't gonna scream. Right, girlie? There are some real bad men after us and we need to be quiet. _Dong ma_?"

She nodded again, just a little calmer this time. Hesitantly Jayne moved his hand away from her mouth in case she decided to change her mind or had just been fooling him. Her eyes searched his face and she whispered, "Simon?"

Shaking his head he placed both of his hands on her shoulders again. "Nope, I ain't Simon. Name's Jayne. I'm gonna get us out of here, okay?"

"Bad men chasing us. So close, too close." She turned her head around to glance at the hallway he'd come out of just a few minutes before.

"That's right." She was still shivering real hard and her skin was like ice. Untying the coat from around his waist he put it around her shoulders. She started a little at the extra weight then put her arms through the sleeves as she seemed to remember what it was for.

"Jayne," she breathed. With a trembling hand she reached out to touch his face. "River. I'm River."

"Well, River. It's time we get a move on." He took a hold of her hand that was still lingering on his goatee and used it to pull her to her feet as he stood. The coat swamped her figure and he couldn't help but feel a passing touch of regret that he couldn't see any of that creamy skin anymore. He grabbed her by the upper arm and half dragged her the last couple of steps to the escape pods when she didn't seem inclined to move on her own. Palming the control panel the door slid open with a loud hiss and he gave the girl a little push to move her in before him.

"Stop right there! By the authority of the Alliance you are under arrest. Place both hands in the air immediately!"

Damn it! He swung round to close the door behind him when a great wall of air sailed through the hatch of the pod, throwing him off his feet. "Fucking sonics," was his last clear thought as he heard the door shut in front of him and he was flung onto the console of the escape pod, hitting his head with a crack against the metal frame and blacking out in an instant.


	2. Chapter 2

Title: Breaking Stasis

Disclaimer: I own nothing

A/N: Thank you so much to everyone who read and reviewed! You all rock, it made a tough work week soooo much better. I wanted to mention that parts of these two chapters are a shout out to Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic, a great computer game I was feeling nostalgic for. Thanks again, hope you enjoy chapter two!

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Something was swatting at his face. It was real light, little taps along his cheekbones and his jawline. In the back of his mind it registered that it probably should be hurting him a lot more, but his head was in such agony that it overwhelmed all other injury. Groaning, Jayne opened his eyes in time to see the crazy cryo girl smack him clean across the face. Judging by the expression on her face and her bright red hand she had been doing it for some time. He reached up and grabbed her wrist, grimacing as a shooting pain ran through his skull. "Gorram it, girl, what you doing that for?"

"You're awake!" River felt the worry flow away from her face and she couldn't help but smile that her efforts had finally come to fruition. "Dangerous probability of an intracranial hemorrhage."

"Yeah, sure." He only understood about half of what she'd said so he brushed it off. Looking around he realized he was lying on the floor of the pod, Persephone's sunlight streaming through the windows. Damn shuttle even seemed to be in one piece. "How the hell we land?"

"I commandeered the shuttle. Without correction our trajectory would have eclipsed Persephone's atmosphere." She could feel her tenuous grip on her sanity slip further, just a little. Somehow when the escape pod had disengaged from the ship she had a moment of clarity. The shuttle's movement had been broken down into physics and calculus. She could clearly see its smallest particles as if they were all laid before her. Puzzle pieces that fit together: angle of attack, dynamic pressure, entry corridor, heat flux, lift over drag, stagnation point. Together they had formed a picture and with more lucidity than she thought she possessed she had been able to see where and how they should land. But as soon as the pod had come touched earth reality had started to fade on her again. She knew she had to get the big man awake as quickly as she could.

"Hah, sure you did girlie." Ain't no way slip of girl like her had landed them. He must've done it himself before he'd gone and blacked out completely.

"River."

Moving cautiously he tried sitting up and almost fell back down again. His head was still pounding like a jackhammer, it felt like a compression coil was tightening around his brain stem, and suddenly all he wanted to do was sleep. "Whatever you say."

He tried leaning back down to rest on the floor on the ship, but her little hands grabbed him and she struggled to keep him upright by his shirt front. "There is no time for this behavior. Gray backs are crawling on their bellies. Crawling closer."

"Gray backs? Speak sense, can't ya?" Maybe her brain was still jumbled from the cryo. Through the fog in his brain he tried to think about folks who wore gray round these parts. Only one group of people came to mind. "_Ta ma de_, you mean the Alliance?"

She nodded eagerly, thrilled he was actually able to understand her. "They watched the bird tumble from the nest, the message in the bottle."

So the Alliance knew where they were. Right, of course they did. "Think it's about time these chickens flew the coop then." Gathering his strength Jayne tried again and managed to stumble to his feet. The effort proved to be too much and he fell heavily against the bulkhead, scrambling for purchase against the smooth walls so he wouldn't fall on his ass again. River saw him pitch to the side as he struggled for equilibrium and she slipped up against him putting her arm around his waist. For one worrisome second he was sure he was just going to take her down with him, but he somehow managed to right himself.

With shaking knees he took the first few trembling steps to the hatch of the pod. "Where we headed? Ya happen to catch where we landed?" he asked, then silently cursed himself for wasting his breath. No way in hell that girl had stepped foot on Persephone before. One look at her, even with her bare feet and only wearing his _hen da de yifu_, and a body could tell she was Core, through and through. Persephone wasn't exactly a true Rim planet, but girlie talked so prettified she could even be from Sihnon or Bellephron.

"Abandoned apartment building nearby. Base camp before summiting Chomolunga." River knew she wasn't really making sense and that it would annoy the big man. But, somehow, she knew just as certainly that the building could provide temporary respite from their zealous pursuers.

He'd be damned if he was going to let some rarified princess tell him what to do. He was about to tell her so, too, except his head started pounding in double time. It took all of his energy just to get his legs moving in the same direction and not act like a total dumbass so as not to draw unwelcome attention to himself. With concentrated effort he managed to work his way up to looking like a sodding drunk being led by his long suffering woman.

They discretely entered the apartment building. After navigating some stairs that River described as decidedly byzantine and Jayne described in such colorful Mandarin that even the genius girl carefully catalogued it in her vocabulary they finally made their way to an empty apartment on the second floor. The complex was mostly deserted, just squatters and the odd petty thief. Good company for two looking to stay under the radar.

River tried to lower Jayne to the apartment's sole, and surprisingly relatively clean, bed carefully, but he was too heavy and fell most of the way down to the hard padding. With another groan (she was beginning to suspect he was not the most stoic of men when it came to pain) he sat upright in middle of the single bed, leaning against the wall.

Closing his eyes against the harsh sunlight that fought the thin paper shades in the windows, he couldn't help but feel a sort of grudging respect. Girl had known where she was going after all. She had done good. Leastways he wasn't lying in some gutter somewhere, looking to all the world like he was three sheets to the wind or worse. Now he could finally sleep.

River had been smiling, sensing his pleasure and gratitude even if he would never put voice to it. He was tired; she could tell. She could feel his weariness roll off of him in waves of dark blue and purple. As the ripples hit her she could feel her own body try to lull itself into slumber. But something, some distant recollection, wouldn't let her rest. She climbed onto the edge of the bed and crawled on her hands and knees to where Jayne was sprawled. Hesitantly she reached up and touched the back of his head below where it rested against the wall. Even though she was expecting the dried blood she still gasped as she felt it on her fingertips, smelt the coppery tang.

The bed had shifted as she moved and Jayne could feel her coming closer. Who knew what _go se_ she was up to now. But when she started prodding him he blearily opened his eyes. The wound was still fresh and angry and it hurt like a bitch to have her poking at him. "What the hell you think you're doing?"

Withdrawing her hand and wiped it on his oversized jacket she stared at him intently. "You experienced significant head trauma."

"No shit."

"I was verifying the injury," she tried to explain. She had seen him sail through the air in the escape pod back in space, seen his back slam against the bulkhead and his head be thrown back to pound against the console. River wanted to smile even though it was inappropriate; her memories had been real, then, and not some induced hallucination.

Shutting his eyes again he grunted out, "You can do whatever the fuck you want as long as you let me sleep."

"No! Must not sleep after undiagnosed head trauma, could enter comatose state!"

Her voice was agitated, frantic, but he didn't stir. Damn it if she wasn't always on about something.

"You are not listening to me!" She tried grabbing his shoulders to shake him, but he was too broad. She could barely get a grip on him even kneeling next to his side. Panic building she swung a leg over his outstretched legs to settle in his lap. Yes, now she could finally reach his shoulders properly. Jostling him as much as she could she tried to explain again. "Must not slumber!"

When the wound in his head brushed against the hard plaster wall he groaned and seized a hold of her wrists to stop her. "_Now_ what the hell do you think you're doing? I've been hurt plenty before, this ain't nothing but a scratch. Lemme be, sooner I can sleep this off sooner we can get off this rock."

"You have a cavalier attitude about death," she said glaring at him.

"_Xie xie. _Yer a real brat, you know that?" He wanted to shout at her, to throw her off of him. He would've too, if it hadn't been for that gorram expression on her face. Complete sincerity wasn't something one saw very often out here on the Rim. Seemed like everyone had an agenda. Plus she was worried some, he could tell. Actually worried about him out of all the people in the 'verse. Couldn't recall the last time someone had been genuinely worried about him like that; probably his ma when he left all those years ago. "But I'm tired," he protested weakly, wincing when it came out as more of a whine than he had intended.

"We need to keep talking. It will help to keep you alert." Gracefully she removed her hands from his grasp and folded them gently in her lap.

"Ain't got nothing to say."

She pursed her lips. "Fine, I shall speak." She wasn't sure why she kept pushing this. If the ignoramus wanted to risk his own life that was his affair. But each time he closed his eyes she could see clearly what would happen: his face fading to a pale mimicry of its color, his body stiffening as rigor mortis set in.

"Well, why were you in that cryo box anyway?" With everything that happened Jayne hadn't had much time to think on it, but now that he had a second to breathe it was unsettling him a little. He reckoned there was only a handful of reasons to put someone in cryo and even less reasons where it ended well for whoever had been shoved into the box in the first place.

"I don't recollect." River frowned. There seemed to be a gap in her memory. The last thing she remembered… "I was at the Academy. And I thought that Simon was coming for me. But instead I awoke from stasis."

There was that name again. "Simon, he your _bao bei_ or something?"

She giggled and Jayne realized it was the first time he had ever heard her laugh. It seemed sad somehow, like she was trying but couldn't quite reach happiness. "Simon is my _gege_. He must still be on Osiris."

"That where you hail from, then?" Slumber was threatening to overcome him again and he figured it was 'cause he was sitting so still like. He liked to be moving, always wanted to be doing something. Didn't really hold for lazing about in bed unless he was sleeping or his John Thomas was getting some welcome attention. He started to move his hands just so that at least some of him was in motion and as if on auto-pilot they found their way to her bare knees as she sat astride him. With little flicks of his thumbs he caressed the inside of her knees and slow began the ascent of the planes of her smooth thighs.

She almost started when his hands touched her knees and her mind instantly began to enumerate the improprieties of the situation. She was wearing a man's overcoat sans undergarments. She wearing a man's overcoat sans undergarments and was sitting in the lap of said man. She was wearing a man's overcoat sans undergarments and was sitting in the lap of said man while he his hands wandered up her legs. His hands were warm and rough and above all incredibly distracting to her thought process. Gamely she bit her lip and continued on; he would not disrupt her concentration. "Yes, I lived there until I was fourteen. Then I… I, I left," she finished lamely.

"Went away to this school?" He had reached the bottom of the coat and he ran his hands along the outside of it, up the sides of her legs and to the small of her back.

"No, not school." There were no words to describe the Academy. Whenever her mind was brave enough, or perhaps foolish enough, to pick through her memories of her time there it was as if she was back. Even now, in this old apartment more than 2 AUs away, she could feel the blind terror she had felt there start to creep on the edge of her consciousness. She could feel her breathing start to accelerate and couldn't distinguish its source. Two warring emotions were fighting for dominance. The fear she had recognized instantly; it had been her constant companion for the last three years. The other was different. It was uncharted territory and somehow it made her feel excited and apprehensive simultaneously.

"No schooling? You some kind of genius or something?" Folks were required to attend school in the Core, even Jayne knew that. He may have left when he was twelve, but she would have had to stay longer. He wasn't particularly listening for her answer though, choosing to focus on the much more interesting contours of her back through his heavy jacket. Even though it was thick and heavy-duty he could still make out the shape of her spine through the cotton. Definitely a bit too far on the skinny side.

She nodded, now somehow breathless. "A wunderkind. But no more. Now I'm broken."

"Mmhmm," he mumbled as his hands stilled and his head relaxed again on the wall. He was just so tired, couldn't shake the feeling.

River could feel him starting to slip away from her again. She wanted to shake him as she had before, but was worried about further brain damage. As his mind lingered between the border of wakefulness and slumber she could suddenly see unbidden into it. She didn't like the feeling; it reminded her, as so many things did, of the Academy. But her control was poor and it took her a few minutes to extract herself. He was thinking of her as she had been when he first opened the cryo box and she blushed to see herself through his eyes. _It's a girl, cute too._ His emotions were still lingering on the surface of his thoughts and they were shot through with red. _Be damned if I'd ever thought a gorram coat would practically give me a hard on_. Her cheeks were surely aflame with the force of her blushes.

She needed to get his attention quickly. The threat of him quietly slipping away had diminished some, but it was still present. Her mind half in Jayne's thoughts and half in her own she did the most logical thing she could think of. Placing her hands back on his shoulders she leaned in hesitantly. Pausing for a moment she looked down on his face. His eyes were closed and his breathing was slow and even. Strong cheekbones, stronger jaw, full lips. A scar close to his mouth, a nose that had been broken at least once, and a goatee that looked unquestionably scratchy. He looked so much calmer, more peaceful like this. His bluster was gone and the angry furrows between his brows had smoothed out, leaving gentle lines in their place. She couldn't help but bridge the gap between them and shyly kiss him.

At first he didn't respond and River felt cripplingly self-conscious. Embarrassment ran through her like a sword through her flesh. She knew only the theory behind kissing, not the practice. How mortifying that her first experiment was such a failure. Despite what she had thought she did not interest him. Then suddenly she felt his lips move beneath her own.

Jayne hadn't known the girl for very long, but he knew that she was unpredictable as hell. Hadn't seen this one coming, that was for sure. _Ta ma de, _but he loved being the big damn hero. He should rescue nekkid girls from distress more often. He'd change his colors and be the good guy full time if it meant getting trim this easily.

He didn't like kissing on the mouth; one good night kiss, a stolen wallet, and a good drubbing would do that to a man. But there was no chance of that here and after he had gotten over his initial shock he returned her demure kiss eagerly. He ran his tongue against her pressed lips and she couldn't help but gasp against the sensation. Never one to not take advantage of a good opportunity he deepened the kiss voraciously, exploring her mouth, her taste, those breathy little moans she was making as her body was overloaded with stimuli. He wrapped one hand in her dark hair, tilting her head for better access. His other hand crept down her back, down to the hem of his coat. Wasn't 24 hours before that he had seen her naked as the day she was born; remembering all that smooth skin he wanted to tear the coat from her body right this second.

River was overwhelmed. She could feel everything. Just the kiss had put her practically at her breaking point and now his hand was inching its way up her leg raising the fabric as it went. She had never felt anything like it before. During her entire time at the Academy she had never felt one gentle touch and after she had given up hope that she would be rescued she had even stopped feeling any positive emotion. To feel wanted, excited, pleasured – it was too much. She put her hand down on top of his stopping its progress and pulled back to break the kiss. "No, Jayne."

"Come on, baby. I'll make you feel real good." He started kneading the flesh under his hand and she felt a current flow through her body.

That was precisely the problem. "Just this," she whispered as she leaned down to kiss him again, taking his wrist to move his hand back to its original position on her back.

Figured. Should've known Core girls didn't move that fast. Wouldn't be the first time. Hell, girls never moved as fast he hoped they would, was why he was so keen on whores. He resigned himself to feeling as much of her back as he could through that ruttin' coat.

She felt as if she was overflowing with emotions. They were surging right up to the walls of their levee; anymore and she would drown. But she knew it was worth the risk. This happiness would slip through her fingers just as surely as her sanity would and she was determined to cling to both for as long as she could.


	3. Chapter 3

Title: Breaking Stasis

Disclaimer: I own nothing :(

A/N: Thank you sooooo much to my reviewers! You are all seriously awesome. I know it's kind of tacky to ask for reviews, but they are really helpful and I appreciate the reassurance that y'all like where this is going. Also big thanks to everyone who made this a favorite or followed this story. Special shout out to my beta, the amazing reaverattack, for graciously agreeing to read this over!

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Whenever Jayne woke up in a strange bed he always did an inventory. Vera? Check. She was still strapped to his back, hanging all awkward down his side since he'd leaned up against the wall. Wallet? Check, as far as he could tell. No new knife wounds or bullet holes? Check and check. Internal organs intact? Check. With those assurances in hand he had enough courage to open his eyes.

Persephone's sun had almost set and the room was dark and foreign. Piece by piece it came back to him; the escape pod, the apartment, the crazy girl. The pounding in his head had finally faded to a dull ache and for the first time he felt more alive than dead. Knew he'd only had a couple of hours of sleep, but it was enough.

Said crazy girl was crouching in front of one of the windows staring down at the street through the crack in the too short shade. Damned if she wasn't muttering to herself to boot. Seeing her like that was a mite unsettling. Had she really kissed him earlier that day? He remember them going at for a while before he'd finally passed out. Guarantee later he'd try to pick up where they'd left off, but the timing right now was shit.

He had to get down to business. His was a straightforward kind of brain and if he wanted to do something right he could only focus on one thing at a time. He pushed the thought of moonbrain girls with lips like velvet out of his mind.

They had to get off this dustbowl planet, and fast. Alliance had a well-earned rep of being vindictive SOBs and it would be just his luck if he got brought in on account of Roscoe's _lese. _And if he was really unlucky and they did some digging they'd see he was still wanted for that job on Higgins' Moon. Ain't no way in hell he was ever going back there.

Besides, that money waiting for him on Boros was itchin' him something fierce. Sure he didn't know the drop location, buyer's face, or even the buyer's name, but Jayne had never been one to let a few obstacles get in the way of a solid payday. Roscoe hadn't really told him exactly how much had been coming to him when they finished the job, but the way Roscoe had been crowing about leaving his idiot crew behind the cash was probably enough to buy his own ship. Far as Jayne was concerned that meant he was set for life. All he had to do was deliver one girl.

Unfortunately, the one girl was now wringing her hands and caterwauling about blue hands. She had seemed nice and docile when she'd been saying thank you that afternoon. He began to feel a little uneasy. Must've been at least twenty hours or so since she'd come out of cryo; any kind of disoriented behavior should have gone away by now. He pushed aside the worrying notion that maybe the girl was a bit more cracked than he'd figured.

Gingerly he got to his feet, every joint in his body protesting on the way up. He was getting too old for this shit.

"C'mon, we're getting' out of here." She was ignoring him apparently, didn't even look up when he spoke to her.

"What're you staring at anyways?"

_"They just keep coming until they take back what you took. Two by two, hands of blue. Two by two. Hands of blue…" She trailed off to stare down at her own hands, turning them over and inspecting them as if she wasn't sure that they belonged to her._

"Who's coming? You mean the feds?" A hint of panic crept into his voice, but she didn't answer. Regardless of whether or not they were here now, Alliance would be crawling all over this place soon enough. Couldn't leave an escape pod in the middle of the city like this, even if it was a slum.

"You hear me, girlie? We're leaving now, _dong ma_?" She still didn't answer and Jayne never had seen much use in patience. He loped over to the window in easy strides and grabbed her arm to pull her to her feet.

"_Xianzai_!" He gave her a little push to get her in the right direction towards the door and she stumbled along, following behind him so slowly he had to keep turning around every couple of seconds to make sure she was still there.

Everything was wrong; River could feel it in her bones, in her blood. When death's glare had finally faded from the man she had let him sleep. It had been an educational experience and she had been disappointed to curtail it. Later, when she had finally fallen asleep herself, she was even sorrier. As soon as she had been alone with her own thoughts in slumber the terror had gripped her. She must have only slept a few minutes because all she remembered were vague images, snippets of conversations and traces of thoughts. The overwhelming, imminent sense of foreboding had smothered everything else in its intensity.

The blue hands were near, maybe even on the planet. She could feel the weight of their thoughts pressing down on her cranium like a vise. They were angry and impatient and frustrated. This was not what their clever blue hands were for; they were not meant to find wayward experiments. They were meant to conduct the experiments themselves, to mold and shape, to bend and break and reassemble into something that was greater than the sum of its parts. The burden of their emotions made her want to whimper with the weight. She wasn't strong enough for this.

She kept stumbling and tripping over her feet. It was impossible to hurry, too much of her energy was being spent on keeping her emotions in check as she tried to remain calm. She was a fox before the hounds and could not go to ground.

Damn girl couldn't even keep up. He stopped again for the hundredth time to wait for her and grimaced at the sight they must make. A mercenary packing heat, even one covered in his own blood, was a common enough sight in these parts. Girl like her, not so much.

They passed a general store and he pulled up short before going in, grumbling under his breath. For a man so focused on the payday he'd never been one to really fuss much over things beyond the essentials: guns, booze, and women. Still, she'd have to put on something less conspicuous or they'd be stopped before they even reached the docks.

Moving as fast as he could he grabbed a pair of boots from a shelf and a handful of clothes and pushed them into her arms, telling her to go change. He pulled his wallet from his pants pockets, feeling its weight. He didn't have much coin on him at the moment, but it should be enough to get them to Boros.

Girl came out of the dressing room still looking for all the world like a little lost puppy, especially still wearing his big, old coat over her baggy dress, but at least she wouldn't stick out quite so much now. He pushed a handful of credits to the bored kid behind the counter to pay for the goods before stepping back into Persephone's twilight.

This wasn't the exactly type of neighborhood to have streetlights or nothing like that, but all down the length of the street neon signs were starting to switch on giving off a kind of hazy glow. The streets got more crowded and the company rougher the closer they got to the Eavesdown docks. The odd passersby was giving him and the girl funny looks which Jayne returned with his patented stay-the-fuck-away-from-me-or-you'll-find-your-head-up-your-own-_pigu_-glare. Didn't help with the uncomfortableness, though. Felt like he was walking around with a suitcase full of platinum to have that girl trailing after him. Knew it didn't make no sense, no one round here knew her worth, but it was still making him mighty uneasy. He waited for her to catch up one more time and then started walking behind her. He was being foolish letting the money out of his sight like that.

River was trying to compose herself as best she could. When the Academy had broken her mind her previous sanity had seemed like some kind of elusive dream, terrible in its impossibility. As time had passed she could remember less and less clearly what it had felt like to own her thoughts. Had she ever been that little girl, truly? Had she played Browncoats and dinosaurs with Simon, danced ballet, and driven everyone to the brink of insanity when she corrected their grammar and sentence structure? Or had she always been a weapon lying in its sheath, waiting to be drawn?

When the pod had crashed and after she had felt whole. Cracked to be sure, and in disarray, but all of the pieces had been there and they had been only _her _pieces, no one else's. Now, though, she felt trapped in some kind of limbo, clinging to fragile reason with shaking hands. She focused on self-preservation; evolution had etched it into her bones and the Academy had only strengthened its emphasis. She wanted to think on other things instead, process new experiences and sensations and maybe dissect the new colors that were streaming from the mercenary, but it was unbearable. There was only room for one idea. She needed to get away from the blue hands.

Finally the Eavesdown docks came into view and it felt like a weight was lifted from Jayne's shoulders. The comforting outlines of spaceships loomed out of the darkness. He'd never been one of those drifters to only feel at home out in the black, but by this point he had spent more than half of his life on one ship or another. These people here, the thugs and the crooks, they were his people. He had carved out his own piece of the 'verse with nothing but his own nerve and perseverance; this was where he belonged. It felt good to be back.

He walked more slowly now, weighing his options. They'd need an unobtrusive berth to Boros, wouldn't do to draw more attention to themselves than necessary. Cheap, too. He wasn't exactly flush with cash at this point. And he'd need a ship where folks kept to themselves, couldn't have no one bothering him or, even worse, the girl.

She jerked to a halt in front of him and he practically tripped over her. The sight of so many space-worthy vessels brought her hope; they were the only way to flee from the blue hands. But she needed answers first.

"What's your problem? Keep going."

She gave him a hard look and for the second time Jayne got that uncanny feeling that maybe she was seeing more than he was showing. "Where are we going?"

"We're getting off of this piece of _go se_." Taking a step he tried to hustle her onwards, but she stood her ground.

"Incomplete data, need to establish parameters for journey."

"I said we're leaving this piss poor excuse of a planet, ain't that enough?"

She didn't say nothing, just raised one eyebrow. Damn girl even managed to look down her nose at him while being a whole foot shorter than he was. That was tricky, that was. Course most _hundans _who figured to look at him that way usually got their legs broken so he hadn't seen it in too long.

"We're gonna go to Boros, alright? Was where we were headed before some Alliance brass decided to shoot our fucking ship out of the sky and put us in the mess in the first place."

"Why was the ship going to Boros?"

Ruttin' perfect, he groaned to himself. He remembered her saying that she didn't remember how she'd ended up in the cryo box. She obviously didn't have a clue 'bout Boros, which meant she didn't know where the box had been headed either. That damn twinge was back, feeling too close to guilt for his comfort. Being transported in cryo was one thing, being transported in cryo without any knowledge on the wherefore and the where to was another.

Still, she looked fine which meant she'd obviously been taken care of at the Academy place she'd been at. Maybe she had just blacked out or something. Mulling over what he had just thought, he gave himself a mental shake. What was he doing, rationalizing over a job like this? He didn't get paid to think, he got paid to do. 'Sides, girl was a grown-ass woman and could take care of herself.

River knew that he wasn't telling her something; that much was plain. She could catch snatches of his thoughts alongside of his words, almost as if he was speaking two separate sentences as once. But they were difficult to grasp.

"'Cause that's what the cap'n wanted." _I liked her better when she was keepin' her mouth shut. _"That was the job. I do the job, I get paid." _Just gotta get to Boros, payday will be like winning the gorram lottery._

"What's the job?" It was too difficult to focus on a single stream of consciousness, each time she tried to follow the thought to its source it slipped through her fingers.

"The job is getting to Boros. You get that through your thick skull yet?" Her questioning was getting him all tetchy. He needed to talk her into behaving biddable again, if that was even possible.

"What if I don't want to go to Boros?" She didn't, not particularly. But she'd eagerly step onto Charon's ferry before staying to wait for the blue hands. The big man, however, didn't know that.

He laughed harshly. "You wanna stay here? You wouldn't last a day."

Crossing her arms in front of her chest she glared at him without a rebuttal. River knew that he right, even without factoring in her cyclical lucidity.

"Listen, I've handled this mess so far, haven't I? _Dui bu dui?_"

She wasn't exactly sure how that was supposed to be convincing. There was not enough evidence to provide a proper statistically significant sample. Still, he was right on this account too. Grudgingly, she muttered, "_Dui_." There would be time to reevaluate the situation later.

"Well, good. We're goin' to Boros, and I'll figure out what to do when we get there."

She nodded just as grudgingly and when he started off again she fell into step beside him. Jayne felt a twinge in what he long ago had stopped thinking of as his conscience that he ruthlessly suppressed. Men who had highfalutin views on morality didn't last long in his line of work. He could drop her off without any guilt when the time came; it was what he did.

Eavesdown was never still, regardless of time of day or year. They wandered down the row of ships, barkers calling out their destinations to attract passengers on either side of them. Jayne didn't spare them a second glance. Ports always charged more to dock close to the entrance and that extra fee was passed on the customers. Only suckers boarded the first ship they saw. Crazy was staring around like a babe in the woods, acting like she hadn't seen a spaceship before. He rolled his eyes; nothing about this was going to be easy.

Suddenly a familiar voice rang out over the shouts in Mandarin and English, the pounding of shifting cargo, the uproar of engine exhaust.

"Jayne Cobb, is that you? Cap'n was sure we was never gonna see you again!" There was no mistaking that cheerfulness and optimism, it was liable to give him a headache just thinking on it.

Sure enough there across the way was a recognizable silhouette in the dusk, a great hulking figure of a firefly. He'd been so busy worrying on the girl he'd missed her at first glance.

"Hey, Kaylee. How you been?" He wished he could turn tail and run, but it was too late now. Kaylee would certainly raise a fuss if he did that. Best just to make the quick small talk and leave soon as he could before any other reunions could take place. Of course, at that moment from behind her he could see Mal making his way out of the cargo bay.

_Ta ma de_, he was really humped now.


	4. Chapter 4

Title: Breaking Stasis

Disclaimer: Joss is boss

A/N: Thank you again to all my fabulous reviewers! Especially everyone who has reviewed more than once, your encouragement is greatly appreciated! 谢谢 to reaverattack for reading this over!

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"Do my eyes deceive me? If it ain't Jayne Cobb!" Mal strode down the ramp to stand next to Kaylee, that tight little smile on his face that didn't reach his eyes. "Now what would you be doing wandering 'round these parts? Last I saw you, you were goin' on 'bout some payday that was gonna make you rich as a king. You blow it all on whores already?"

Jayne laughed uneasily, trying to inconspicuously move in front of River so Mal wouldn't pay her any attention. Mal had a damn annoying tendency to go all noble when there weren't no reason for it. Wouldn't hold with girls in cryo boxes, that was for damn sure. "You know how plans go, Mal. Shit, this one went so badly you might've planned it."

At the comment Kaylee let out an inadvertent giggle before looking guiltily up at Mal. "Sorry, cap'n."

"Just passing through, _dong ma_? Ain't no call to raise a fuss."

"We're going to Boros," interjected River, moving out from behind Jayne's bulky frame. He was ignoring her. Worse, he was denying her very existence, pretending she wasn't there. Muddy streaks of sepia and burgundy ran between the big man and the Browncoat; intervention was needed to prevent escalation to vermillion.

Mal and Kaylee both started as they noticed River for the first time. The shock was clear on their faces; Jayne wasn't the type to travel with a partner, much less a teenage girl.

"Is that so? And who might you be?" Some of the harshness left Mal's face as he spoke, but he still looked tense and angry.

Their curiosity, though well-intentioned, overwhelmed her. Curiosity was a powerful emotion and it clouded her mind, a blue haze that covered her thoughts. Struggling as she formed the syllables, she whispered, "River."

Mal frowned, taking in the effort that was playing across her face. Kaylee was immediately more accepting. "Don't be nervous, sweetie! I'm Kaylee, the mechanic on my girl here, Serenity. And this here is our cap'n, Mal."

Shifting his attention from River back to Jayne, Mal kept his tone alarmingly calm. "Anything here you think oughtta be explained?"

"Aww, hell, I ain't done nothing wrong!" Jayne put up his hands in self-defense. Projecting innocence and wounded virtue didn't come naturally to him, but he gave it a shot. "She was a just a passenger on my last ship, is all. Her brother's paying good coin to get her to Boros. That's it." Mentally he congratulated himself on his fast thinking. Best not to say he had no clue who the buyers was, much less that she'd been in cryo. Adding in the bit about her brother made the whole story seem nice and kosherized.

River sent him a pointed look, but didn't say anything. Finally, girl was learning to keep her mouth shut.

"A passenger, huh? And why didn't y'all make it? What happened to your ship, Jayne?" Mal was still feeling out his story and it pissed Jayne off to no end.

"Blew a compression coil," he spat with a nasty grin. Kaylee was always harping on Mal about them and he never paid her no mind. "Ones that ain't fried are all laid up in the gorram hospital."

"Is that right?" The skepticism was clear on Mal's face and this time the question was directed to River.

She nodded. "We need to go to Boros." They needed to go anywhere at all, provided they were putting exhaust between her and the blue hands.

"Ain't that shiny! We're going to Boros ourselves in a couple of stops, right cap'n?" Kaylee beamed at both of them. She had liked Jayne, even if he hadn't been with them very long and was usually crabby most of the time, and had missed him when he left. With the same ease in which she made friends with everyone she mentally added River to the list of people she liked, people that belonged on Serenity.

"No." Mal and Jayne bit out the word simultaneously.

"But he's crew!"

"He _was _crew. He choose to leave, ya hear?" Mal was still a little sore on the subject, even if he'd never admit it to himself. 10% and his own bunk was a generous cut, but the merc had still skipped out right before a big job.

"We'll find our own berth. No reason we got to bunk with y'all again." No reason either for Mal and Zoe to stick their noses into Jayne's business.

"Good luck with that," Mal laughed.

"Why you say that?" Jayne's guard went up instantly.

"Whole damn dock is land-locked, has been for the past eighteen hours or so." A gorram inconvenience too. The odd ship was land-locked all the time, but Mal had never heard of an entire dock being locked down. Especially not one as large as Eavesdown.

"You gotta be shitting me." Jayne groaned, unease growing in the back of his skull. Eighteen hours was a bit too coincidental for his liking. It was just a few hours after his old ship had been boarded in atmo, must've been right around the time that shuttle had crashed back in the slums. The Feds had gotten Roscoe for sure, so why take the pains to make sure nobody made it off this rock? Surely he and the girl had been the only ones to make it plantside?

"For true," Kaylee nodded. "Won't tell a soul why either, all the crews here are as mad as all get out. Shoulda heard Wash swear a blue streak when he saw it!"

Mal smiled; this time it was the slightly artificial one that always pointed towards a certain companion. "Good thing we got our ambassador with us. Was what I was coming down to tell you, _meimei,_ Inara's worked her wiles on her latest client and gotten our land-lock lifted. Diplomacy at its finest."

"_Zhen de ma? Hen hao!_ Sure you don't want to come with us, Jayne?"

He shook his head stubbornly. "Naw, we'll find another way." _Taikong suoyou de xingqiu saijin wo de pigu! _Now he and crazy were going to have to lay low somewhere until the land-lock was lifted on the docks. While the Alliance brass was out there searching for someone, most likely someone on that fucking ship. He was getting a bad feeling about this…

There was an awkward silence and no one moved except for River who was starting to shake. The blue hands knew where she was, were coming closer and closer with each passing moment. If they didn't leave soon all would be lost. The blue hands were relentless in their pursuits; River had no doubt they would search each hovel, each sewer tunnel to find what they were looking for.

Beside him Jayne could feel River start to shiver again. Dammit all, this was not the time for her to go all _feng le_. Mal's hackles would be up in a second. He put his hand on her back discreetly so the others wouldn't see, trying to calm her down some. Couldn't really tell for sure, but it looked like it might be working.

She stared up at him, her eyes almost impossibly wide. "We need to leave this place, _now_."

He gritted his teeth, wanting to shout at her and being forced to settle for a whisper. "Think I don't know that?"

Trying to keep his frustration in check, Jayne gave a half-assed wave in their direction. "Thanks anyway, Kaylee." Jayne half turned, about to pull River with him. His mind was already whirling. He had been wrong before, now they were really humped. Weren't many vessels as could get around a lockdown like this, and most would be at least affiliated with the Alliance which ruled them right out. They could try to bide their time somewhere close to the docks. Course he didn't have much coin and it wouldn't last long when he took out the cost of the passage to Boros. The trains were probably crawling with feds too, but it seemed like their best bet for now. They could travel to another dock and if there was any luck left in the 'verse it wouldn't be land-locked too. If it was… well, best not to dwell on it.

The rumble of an engine stopped him as Wash pulled up on the mule, the back stocked high with boxes and packages. He didn't seem to notice Jayne and River at first and turned towards Mal. "Rest of the power cells you asked for. Got 'em pretty cheap too, some ships are rescheduling their runs on account of the land-lock."

As Wash about to pull the mule into the cargo bay he finally spotted Jayne. Impressive, considering his 6'4" bulk. "_Laotienye!" _he yelled, looking about half ready to jump out of his skin.

Jayne sneered at him. "Don't worry, little man. Just passing through."

Wash stared at him for a couple of seconds, then slowly shook his head. "You gotta lot of _gaowan_ coming here, I'll give you that. If I were you I'd be halfway across the system by now, discreetly living as a professional geese juggler. Or perhaps a fry cook. That's the tricky part of crafting a new identity; too many options."

"What the hell you goin' on about?" Jayne leaned forward on reflex, intimidatingly looming over Wash on the mule as his hands tightened into fists. "You wanna go?"

"Hey, easy there pal. It takes a real man to face the music, though I imagine in this case there will be less of the singing and more of the shooting."

Mal took a step forward, his hand resting lightly on his sidearm as he was ready to intervene. "Wash, you care to explain yourself?

Turning his head back and forth to stare at both of them, Wash's mouth dropped open in shock. "You don't know? Seriously, neither of you know?"

"Wash…" Mal drew the name out, a sure sign he was getting impatient.

"Both of you, follow me up to the bridge. You ain't gonna believe me unless I show you." He climbed down off of the mule. "Kaylee, mind bringing this on?"

"Sure thing!" Kaylee looked at Jayne once last time before starting up the mule again. Now was obviously not the time to be asking questions.

"If you're joking about this, I swear—"

"No jokes, Jayne. Come on." Mal and Jayne ascended the cargo ramp behind Wash, following him to the bridge. River trailed along behind, balancing the knife's edge between distress and hysteria. They didn't have time for this!

Wash sat down heavily in the pilot's seat and began pulling up the cortex. "I noticed these a few hours ago while I was trying to get some intel on the lockdown since Feds weren't talking."

"Just show us already." Mal's voice was tense. He knew he wasn't going to like what he was about to see.

"Here it is." With one last push of a button Wash had navigated through the Alliance database to pull up a warrant.

It was Jayne.

Issue time was only a few hours after the land-lock had gone into effect and the Alliance had managed to pull up some dodgy old photo that Jayne was pretty sure was from a cool-down he spent in some jail after a public intoxication arrest. But it was the bounty on the warrant that drew everyone's attention.

"Holy shit."

"_Ta ma de_."

Enough money to buy his own ship, two ships even. Way more money than he was getting for delivering the girl. And down at the bottom in bold print were the words "CLASSIFIED" and "WANTED ALIVE FOR QUESTIONING."

Jayne felt the bottom of his stomach fall out. Sure he'd been in trouble with the law before, but this was something else. Not to mention that he'd been wandering around Persephone and the docks for the past couple of hours like a complete dumbass.

"What the fuck is going on here?" Any humor that had been in Mal's voice previously was gone now and he drew his weapon.

"I dunno, Mal, I swear!"

Mal cocked his revolver.

"Look, I was on that ship that done got boarded in atmo. But I didn't do nothing! They were after my partner! I ain't stupid enough to raise a ruckus on a core planet!"

"Feds don't put this much platinum out there for nothing. I suggest you start thinking a little harder."

Nervously Wash cleared his voice from his seat. "I think I may be able to shed some light on the subject." He pressed a key and another warrant flashed up on the screen.

This one was of the girl, looking like a mix of a mental patient and a vengeful ghost. And her warrant was two and half times what his worth. Just looking at all those zeroes made Jayne's eyes cross.

The picture scared her. It was of her time at the Academy, when everything had scared her. She reached up to tug on Jayne's sleeve. "We need to leave, _now!_"


	5. Chapter 5

Title: Breaking Stasis

Disclaimer: Joss is boss

A/N: As always, thanks to my amazing reviewers! Reviews are love; I can't express how much I love seeing those little guys pop up. Any and all feedback is appreciated!

Quick question for y'all. I know that these aren't the longest chapters (3600 words this time though! Woohoo!), but would people prefer longer chapters that might take a bit more time to post or chapters of this length at least once of week? Let me know!

Self reviewed so all mistakes are my own. If any mistake is too egregious please point it out to me and I will update. Thanks!

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Jayne grabbed River by the arm so he could look her in the eyes. "What the hell did you do? How you worth so much money?" He'd never seen warrants that high, not unless it was for some crazed assassin or revolutionary or something. She clearly didn't fit the bill.

Her entire body shaking she struggled to form the words. "She did nothing. This is for the transgressions of others. Two by two, hands of blue."

"Will you cut it out with that blue _gose_!" Fighting to control his temper and the panic that was bubbling up from somewhere in his chest, he couldn't remember the last time he'd felt so out of control of a situation. They had to get off of this rock right quick or else the Feds would pinch him for sure. But with all these ships land-locked, that only left…

Staring down the barrel of the gun still pointed at his head, Jayne turned to Mal. "Mal, you gotta take us on!"

"Well, ain't that a humorous turn of events. I recall not too long ago you being bound and determined to find your own way." Mal smiled, his entire form tense.

Just as Jayne thought it couldn't get any worse, he heard another click behind him as a gun was cocked. He would bet his last coin it was a mare's leg and sure enough Zoe called out, "Everything alright here, sir?"

"Not as such, Zoe. Seems Jayne and company are wanted fugitives and looking to ship out with us."

"Is that so, sir? Puts us in a bit of an interesting situation then, doesn't it." Slowly Zoe stalked into the room, keeping her weapon trained on Jayne as she covered the exit. Jayne had been keeping still before, but after seeing Zoe he made sure not to move a single muscle. Mal may be trigger happy, but Zoe was the one who got shit done.

"I can pay you, I got money! Legit, I swear! You don't even have to take us all the way to Boros, just any place but here." Jayne looked beseechingly at Mal, cursing his luck. Man could hold a grudge; Mal was still mad at the Alliance for the war, no way he was going to let Jayne aboard.

Mal and Zoe exchanged significant glances in their own war buddies code and Jayne fought the urge to roll his eyes. Apparently Wash felt no such compunctions, since he chose that time to do so and piped up, "Whatever you're going to do, Mal, you'd better make it quick. Feds will be on us inside of fifteen minutes. They only agreed to lift the land-lock if they could sweep the ship, Inara just got us to the head of the line."

That panic was more than bumbling now, it was a gorram fountain rising up the back of Jayne's throat. "Dammit, c'mon Mal! You can even have some of the cash when I hand off the girl. Look at her, you know she ain't done nothing wrong. And my bounty – I'm an innocent bystander! Hand to God, I swear!"

Wash snorted at that. "I don't think you've been innocent since birth. Probably kicked the midwife for spanking you."

After more furtive gazes with Zoe, Mal's face seemed to relax marginally. He uncocked the hammer of his gun, but kept it in his hand. "It may be that I have a proposition for you, Jayne. Just so happens we have a bit of a situation on our hands, too. Did a job for Badger which he was disinclined to pay us for. Goods are marked, only one round here who'll touch 'em is Patience over on Whitefall."

"Didn't she shoot you?" Jayne interjected and he saw Zoe sigh in resignation.

"Like I been saying, that was a long time ago. Anyway, I don't trust Patience none too well and odds are we'll be walking into a trap. Zoe and I aren't enough to handle this one. You do this run for us, plus the cash, and I'll say we're square."

Jayne's jaw dropped open on reflex; he couldn't believe Mal was budging. They must really need to unload their cargo. He looked into Mal's face trying to gauge his intentions. Mal looked angry still, sure, but there was frustration and desperation there too. Desperate to want Jayne's help on this job or desperate to hand him into the Feds? Jayne knew he'd have to watch his back, but right now he didn't give a good gorram. "You won't regret this, I promise you! Anything you need, you just lemme know."

"I'll promise you one thing too, you do give me any cause to regret this and you will not live to take another breath. Are we perfectly clear?" Mal's face was hard and his jaw clenched as he forcefully holstered his weapon.

"One hundred percent!" Jayne was so relieved he felt almost sick, like he was going to lose it right there on the floor of the cockpit.

"There is no time for placations! They are coming!" River wrapped her fingers in his shirt sleeve, gripping the fabric and attempting to drag him forcefully through the door with no success. How could no one else feel their pressure, their anger? Servants of the blue hands were approaching, puppets without strings that would only do their masters' bidding.

He grabbed her hands, trying to quiet her in case she was about to go apeshit again. "We're getting outta here, keep yourself together," he whispered to her through gritted teeth. Damn if he wasn't sure opening that box was a blessing or a curse right about now.

"You're gonna have to hide yourselves in Inara's shuttle, it's the only place the Feds can't search with any real thoroughness. Sacred whorehouse and all that. Y'all head down there now, I'll explain it all to our ambassador." Mal gestured with his chin to the stairs and Jayne nodded sharply, still trying to keep the girl under control.

"Hurry, will you? 'Nara ain't never let me in her shuttle before, don't think she's keen to start now." With Jayne half pushing, half guiding River the pair headed down through the crew quarters.

Zoe stood stoically in the corner, her face almost impassive as she looked to Mal. "Sir, was that really wise? Letting him waltz back in here like this?"

"I hear you, Zoe, I do," Mal agreed with a grimace. "But no way 'round it; we need the backup on Whitefall. Patience already has the deck stacked in her favor, just the two of us can't take her and that posse she's got."

"I still think—"

"Zoe. We don't get paid, we can't fuel this ship."

She nodded reluctantly, as Wash looked nervously between the captain and his first mate. "He's trouble, sir."

"Damn straight. But it ain't like we got a lot of options at this point. Besides," his grim expression lifted and he flashed her a cheeky smile, "sneakin' two high profile fugitives past the Feds? You can't tell me that ain't all manner of shiny!"

The muscles around Zoe's eyes tensed up and Wash could tell she was fighting to keep her composure. She tilted her head as she holstered her gun. "You believe that story he told? About the girl and all?"

"Some of it I reckon is true," Mal nodded. "Jayne ain't smart enough or stupid enough to get a warrant like that on his head without a helping hand. But that girl…" He broke off for a moment, staring down at the bustle of activity on the docks through the cockpit viewport. "Can't say as I trust he has good intentions. But if it does go belly up at least we'll be in a position to rectify it all."

"If you say so, sir. If you get shot can I have your cut from this job?"

Mal grinned as he turned to head down to the shuttle. "Now, when do I ever get shot?" Descending the stairs he called over his shoulder, "Wash, the instant we get clearance I want her up in the air bound for Whitefall!"

Feeling the weight of imminent doom and the near certainty of a colossal pile of _gose_ on his shoulders Wash half-heartedly refreshed his screens, but the angry red land-locked sign remained. "Well, we'll know in about ten minutes if we're all headed to the big house." He sighed theatrically. "The waiting is the hardest part."

Zoe chuckled as she leaned against the back of his pilot's chair, the ends of her curly hair brushing the top of his head. "I don't like this, husband."

"I don't know, it's not all bad. I for one missed his belching and flatulence. Next to his over-abundance of testosterone my own levels are a welcome change of pace."

"You certainly do manage to keep everything in perspective." She bent down and kissed him quickly before following Mal's path out of the cockpit.

* * *

Hurrying down to the shuttle, Jayne slid the door open without ceremony. An indignant voice sounded from inside. "Mal, must I constantly have to remind you about entering my shuttle without my express permission?"

Coming to the doorway, Inara started as she saw Jayne with River still clinging to his shirt.

"Hey, 'Nara. How's the whorin' treatin' you?" He looked her up and down, his eyes raking over her curves.

She crossed her arm which in Jayne's mind did all sorts of delightful things to her figure. "Jayne, I should have realized. I thought I recognized a foul stench when I came aboard."

Leering at her, he ran his tongue over his teeth. "You know, I'm not crew no more. Your sexin' rule don't apply to me, now does it?"

Smiling up at him insincerely, she laughed. "You're right. I could take you on as a client with impunity. It's too bad that you'll never be able to afford me."

"We can haggle later. You gotta let us hide on your shuttle, Feds are right on our tail." He shouldered his way past her into the room as she attempted to bar his entrance.

"I will do no such thing! When Mal hears—"

"Ambassador!" Mal had finally caught up and knew it was best to intervene before he had a situation on his hands. "Got a favor to ask of you." He pulled her aside to stand in the cargo bay catwalk as Jayne frantically explored the shuttle.

Under the bed? No, too low. Feds would stick their heads in at least, so they had to make sure they couldn't be seen from the doorway. Cockpit? No, no cover in case they _did_ come in.

He'd thought about being in 'Nara's shuttle a thousand times before, usually when he was alone late at night. That typically went along the lines of her grabbing him, whispering that she couldn't take another minute of not being able to touch him, screaming that she needed him inside of her. To say that the way it had actually played out was a letdown was one hell of an understatement.

"Are you _insane, _Mal?" Inara's shriek rang through the entire cargo bay and Mal rushed to shush her, his murmurs covering her objections.

River stood wringing her hands in the center of the shuttle. They were at the precipice; they must act quickly. Suddenly her eyes landed on the heavy damask that covered the walls, hiding the dull steel from view. Examining the folds carefully she moved to stand before them. Crouching down she cautiously lifted the fabric and craned her head underneath. As she had suspected there was a solid foot of wasted space in certain portions of the cloth due to the complex drapery.

"What the hell you doing, moonbrain?" Jayne had turned around and after not seeing the girl a brilliant flash of panic exploded in his chest. Had she managed to wander off already? Out of the corner of his eye he saw her creep underneath the cloth.

"_Renci de Fozu! _They're _both _fugitives?" Damn woman was hollerin' like a fishwife.

Jayne stepped over to where the girl had now disappeared behind the curtain just as Mal stuck his head in the shuttle. "Word from Wash; you got two minutes. Both of you stay in here till we give you the all-clear, you hear me?"

"You got it, Mal. I think we can both fit behind this here curtain."

Mal nodded curtly and shut the door to the shuttle, drawing Inara with him down to the cargo bay doors to wait.

As gracefully as he could Jayne crawled underneath the fabric, trying not to catch it on his boots and wincing when Binky momentarily snagged. The air was oppressive and stifling and there was some kind of nasty smell that just seemed to hang there. It tickled the back of his throat, threatening to make him cough. Some stupid kind of core shit; he was sure of it.

At first he could barely see a thing, but his vision soon adjusted as he could just barely see the light that filtered in through the curtain. Through the embroidery he could see vague shapes where the light was brightest: the door, the bed, the cockpit. He straightened out as best as he could, being careful not to disturb the air around him, feeling each vertebrate in his back crack as they aligned into place. Girl was all curled up on the floor still, muttering to herself.

Barely suppressing a groan, he reach down for her and yanked her to her feet. If she decided to have a spell then they were good as gone.

River stared up at him with wide eyes. There was little room to maneuver behind the cloth; it was as if all sides were pressing in on her, trapping her. The gray backs were close now, she could feel their impatience and annoyance step ever nearer to their bolthole. And behind them, stretching for miles and miles, lay the blue umbilicals that rested in the hands of their masters. She whimpered, turning her face to press into Jayne side. "Hands of blue…"

"None of that," he whispered to her fiercely. "You say one thing, make one fucking noise, and those hands are gonna grab you and me both. You shut the fuck up, right this second."

Her mind understood, but her body would not comply. She clasped both hands over her mouth to try to keep in any wayward sounds, but she knew that it would not be enough. She was still not completely in control of her functions.

Quickly he turned her around so that her back was pressed into his front, and he backed up as far as he could until he was flush with the wall. Batting her hands away he wrapped one hand firmly over her mouth, his rough hands struggling to be gentle. His other arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her towards him and putting a few more inches between them and the curtain. The girl was shaking underneath his hands and he figured she must be scared shitless. It didn't sit well that a woman would be so terrified of him, any woman, especially when this wasn't even a job. He bent down to her ear level and whispered, "I ain't gonna hurt you."

She turned her head to look at him, but instead of the terror he was expecting to see there was something else. Something that looked far too close to trust for his liking. Here they were, about one decibel away from being royally and terminally humped, and she was acting like he was just going to fix all of this _gose_. Weren't right; girl must be half cracked.

They had reached the summit and had begun their descent. River breathed a sigh of relief that was captured by Jayne's hand. She wasn't sure of his motivations; his emotions were a swirling whirl of colors that confused her. She knew that he was scared. She could see it in the black haze that surrounded him, feel it as her head rested against his chest while his heart pumped a staccato beat driven by adrenaline. But regardless of his intentions he was keeping her safe, protecting her from the blue hands and her own body that could so easily turn treasonous.

She wrapped her hands around the arm that clasped her waist, anchoring herself, and waited.

Staring down at the little body in his hands he could barely fathom that she had that bounty on her head. If he hadn't seen it himself he never would've believed. Girl was about as timid as a mouse and as dangerous as one. She never could've hurt a soul. Must be some political shit. He never did hold for politics; it was just fancy men saying fancy words with their hands on their side arms.

Jayne felt like he stood there for an age. There was no sense of time; he could have stood there five minutes or an hour and never had been able to tell the difference. His leg muscles were starting to cramp up, little tingles that shot up and down his calves and threatened to make his legs buckle. He didn't even dare shifting his weight, just leaned up against the wall as the girl leaned up against him. Thank all that was good and holy that she was managing to keep her head this time.

Finally, he could hear voices at the entrance to the shuttle. They were half caught in the threads of the damask, but little pieces floated through.

"My shuttle… place of unity… rent… spiritual union…" Every whore knew her spiel. Might sound more Core-ified and fancy, but it all came down to the same thing.

He looked down at the girl and her eyes were closed. Her breathing was light against his palm and he was suddenly conscious of how large his hands were against her. He felt like he could accidentally crush her against him she was so fragile. His mind lingered for a moment on more pleasant memories when those hands had been somewhere else, when they were almost encompassing her thighs, spanning the width of her back. He gave himself a stern mental shake. His pecker always did make his concentration worth shit.

There were figures moving in the room now, walking over to the cockpit and ambling about without purpose. His fingers clenched reflexively and he struggled to relax his grip on her.

Within another minute or two the room looked empty again, but he wasn't stupid enough to break cover yet. Only when the thrusters kicked in at last, when the thrumming of the engine made the entire ship vibrate with its pulse, did he release the girl.

She crawled out on hands and knees and lifted the curtain for him to pass through. Taking in big gulps of clean air he breathed a tremendous sigh of relief and stretched out the kinks in his body. Grabbing each elbow he stretched each arm behind his back, trying to relieve some of the tension in his shoulders. Girl just sat on the floor, not a feather ruffled. Good, maybe this _feng le_ crap was finally behind them.

Not long after Mal strode into the shuttle, Inara and Zoe close behind him. His grin stretched from ear to ear. "Well, I do believe our luck has turned. Looks like one of my plans went off without a hitch!"

"Never doubted you for a moment, sir," Zoe said dryly.

"If your little mission is complete, may I please have my shuttle back now? These are my personal quarters and I already need to rehang this drapery." Inara glowered at Mal underneath her lashes.

"Good riddance," Jayne grunted. "Smells funny in here anyway."

"For the last time; it's incense!"

"Not to worry, ambassador. I'm sure Jayne and his," Mal struggled for the word, "friend will be quite comfortable in our passengers' dorm."

"Works for me." Jayne didn't care much where they bunked down, his body was starting to realize it hadn't gotten proper, non-head trauma induced rest in almost two days. As the adrenaline wore off exhaustion was beginning to kick in.

River got to her feet, the omnipresent crush of the blue hands finally abated. She turned to Mal and the words came to her just a little more easily. "She thanks him for the refuge of calm."

Mal didn't have a clue what she was saying, except for that fact that she was showing the gratitude that Jayne was too stubborn to now that the danger was passed. Bounty or not, she seemed like a sweet enough kid. "Always happy to give the Alliance the metaphorical finger. But we're gonna have a long talk about that price on your head, _dong ma_?"

She nodded, already dreading their questioning, and moved to follow Jayne.

"Oh, and Jayne?" Mal called out as Jayne made to leave the shuttle. "Be civil to our other passengers will you? We need that coin somethin' fierce."

"You got other passengers on the ship?" Jayne raged, turning around to face Mal. "Those folk could ID us! Why the fuck didn't you tell me?"

"Don't see how you had much choice in the matter." Mal's grin faded and his expression returned to the antagonistic state it usually assumed when talking to Jayne. "You and I both know that I did you one mighty big favor."

"You shoulda kicked 'em off!"

"After they'd already boarded? Like that wouldn't have raised any eyebrows. 'Sides, Kaylee took one of 'em on while y'all were up on the cockpit. She didn't know you were coming along."

Jayne groaned, one hand reaching up to rub his face. This day kept getting better and better.


	6. Chapter 6

Title: Breaking Stasis

Disclaimer: Joss is boss

A/N: Sorry for the wait everyone! I was without a computer for the last few weeks and needless to say it was pretty traumatic. Thanks for bearing with me! I apologize if there are any mistakes, this is a little rough but I just wanted to get it up here. On the bright side I got 9 reviews for the last chapter, woohoo! Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who reviewed, favorited, or followed. Reviews are love and may lead to faster updates :)

* * *

Jayne knew the steps of the ladder in his bunk by heart and when his foot reached the metal floor it was already stepping away to make room for the girl to come down. After arguing with Mal for nigh on fifteen minutes back on 'Nara's shuttle Jayne had managed to convince the man that River could stay in his bunk on the condition that Jayne slept in the passenger dorm. A condition which he naturally ignored.

Girl was too damn valuable to leave by herself in those dorms; the doors on the _gose_ things didn't even lock. It'd been bad enough when he'd been the only one who knew how much she was worth, but now half the system was probably on the lookout for that bounty. Ain't no way in hell he was letting those other passengers meet her, his luck one of them would even be a Fed. No sir, that girl was staying in this bunk the whole stupid trip if need be.

For a minute he'd wondered if it was still worth it to drag her ass all the way to Boros. Maybe the whole thing was a setup, some kind of back-up plan the Feds had cooked up, and he'd be pinched soon as he delivered her. But the more he thought on it, he reckoned that didn't make any kind of sense. Whoever was waiting for her on Boros weren't Alliance and that was good enough for him.

With a price on his head like this it meant no more Core work, no more jobs on the inner-Rim for that matter. Hell, odds were that the smartest thing to do would be to head on back to Asgard and hunker down with his family for a spell until this whole thing blew over. Course, he was never known for doing the smart thing, especially when cashy money was to be had. No, he'd turn her over just like he'd planned and use the coin to hide out in style for once. There were more than a few planets that still had no love for the Alliance and wouldn't look much farther than the color of his money.

All he had to do was get a one hundred pound slip of a girl to Boros. Who may or may not be cracked. With a bounty on her that would mean winning the lottery to any piece of Rim trash out there. And without Mal finding out what was really going on. Ruttin' perfect, he grumbled to himself.

Said slip of a girl had finally descended the ladder, delicately finding each rung before carefully shifting her weight. She looked around curiously and Jayne tried to ignore how strange it felt to be back in his old bunk again. He watched her as she cautiously stepped over to the bed before sitting down on it with a little sigh.

Time to lay some ground rules. "Now you listen here, girlie. This is your bunk for this whole damn ride, _dong ma_? No leavin', no walkin' around, no nothin'. Mal, being the sumbitch he is, has got two other passengers on board. No way to know who they are, whether they know about the price on your head or mine. Ain't safe for you to be talkin' to them, or even for them to see you."

"River," she said quietly, but distinctly.

Was she seriously harping on this shit again? "Sure, whatever. Point is, no goin' up that ladder till I give the go ahead."

"Confined within a steel hexahedron? Ennui is inevitable, one sin for which there is no forgiveness." Crossing her arms in front of her chest, she glared at him.

He'd only understood the last bit of that, but it was enough to know she was pissed. "Don't you bitch at me. You want those blue hands to get you again?" That splitting headache was starting to return and he was on his last nerve.

Swallowing hard, she shook her head vehemently. "No. No more blue hands, never again."

"Then you'd better listen to me. We clear?"

She didn't answer, just stared up at him with those eyes that were starting to unsettle him something fierce. Her face was etched and lined with fatigue and he could tell that she was barely keeping herself together. Cryostasis could leave a body with a mighty hangover and it looked like her's was finally kicking in full force.

"Shiny," he muttered. He double checked that the hatch to his bunk was locked, trying the handle several times just to reassure himself. Grunting in satisfaction, he carefully laid Vera down on the floor and began unstrapping the most cumbersome of his guns from his person to lie neatly beside Vera.

River looked on apprehensively. She was exhausted and could feel her thoughts become muddled and murky. Everything had happened so quickly on Persephone, but now that the blue hands projected anger was becoming dimmer and dimmer she could at last realize her own weariness. Her arms and legs felt weighted down, her eyes burning, her mind crying for rest. There was only one bunk in the cabin and she had no wish to share with the big man considering what had happened last time in the dingy apartment. Even though she was certain she could sleep on the floor, the soft mattress was so welcoming and alluring that she hoped he would sleep elsewhere.

Feeling her eyes still on him, he turned around to face her. "I ain't leavin' you alone. Easy enough to override these locks if you know what you're doing and the damn dorms are too far away in case something happens. Any of the crew comes down here and asks you, you tell 'em I slept in the dorms just the same. You got it?"

She nodded again. His logic was sound; she had enough self awareness to know that she would never be able to protect herself in her current state, wouldn't even be able to run. With one last longing look at the bed she started to get up, knowing that he would claim the mattress.

"Gimme that coat, will you?"

Mutely she struggled out of it, even the simple movements seeming too much for her heavy limbs. When she'd managed to extricate herself from its embrace at last she held the heavy garment out to him.

"You get the bed, I'll take the floor." Floor was hard as fuck and likely cold to boot, but it would have to do. Lord knows he'd slept in worse places. He took the coat and balled it up in his hands, lying down on the floor and stuffing it underneath his head as a makeshift pillow.

"_Xiexie_," she murmured, running her hand across the rough blanket that felt like velvet after her long years of confinement.

"Yeah, yeah, _bie keqi_ and all that shit. Hit the light."

She reached up to the turn the light off and quickly climbed under the covers. She couldn't remember feeling so comfortable in her life; feather beds and down coverlets on Osiris had never felt so wonderful as the foam padding and synthetic fabric did now. She could feel sleep begin to claim her almost instantly and she had almost succumbed when his voice rang out, jolting her awake.

"Don't think this means we ain't talkin' on that bounty. You puttin' me in a heap of trouble and I mean to find out why."

The blankets instantly lost their warmth and she shuddered silently. She couldn't speak on the Academy, she wasn't strong enough. Uneasily her thoughts raced as she tried to think of how she could change his mind and persuade him to drop the subject. Realizing that nothing was likely to sway him, she worried in the dark for several long minutes until finally passing out.

* * *

The restraints were biting into her wrists, forehead, and ankles. The room was pitch dark except for a blinding light shining down onto her and she could feel that she was back in the chair. It was just a plain metal chair, but she would never forget it, how it trapped her, imprisoned her.

She barely stifled a shriek as she registered where she was. Back in the Academy. Frantically her eyes scanned the room, trying to discern any kind of shape in the darkness. But it was just as it had been before. She could see nothing, hear no one. She felt water run down her face and realized she had begun crying. The sobs racked her body as she was filled with dread. She knew what came next; the needles.

They must have caught her, boarded Serenity and drugged her. She'd been foolish to trust in the ship, to trust in Jayne, to think that she could ever be free from the blue hands. She would never be able to escape again and the tears came harder as she thought on the punishment she'd receive. Something inside of her broke, something that she didn't even know she still possessed. It was utterly hopeless. The tears were coming so fast that she was almost choking, barely able to breathe, and they dripped down onto her sterile gown. She would never be free, she would never be free…

Her entire body shaking with fear against the restraints, she suddenly saw the disembodied needle descend from above into the light surrounding her. Screaming she tried to twist away from it, but she could barely move her head. There was no way to stop it; it kept coming closer and closer till it was a scant centimeter from her forehead. Her throat was raw, her lungs almost empty of air, but she couldn't stop screaming. Her shriek uselessly pierced the air; no one would ever save her.

Her cry was cut off and for one terrible instant she thought the needle had entered her brain. Then with a jolt she was thrown into consciousness. There was no chair; she was lying on the bunk inside Serenity's belly. Her scream had been stopped because a very large, warm hand was covering her mouth so completely she could hardly make a sound.

"Dammit, River, wake up!"

Her eyes shooting open, she looked up in time to see Jayne's face relax its tension to an expression almost like relief.

"_Ta ma de_, what the hell you think you're doing? You want Mal to catch me?"

He was looming over her, one knee on the mattress so he could reach her. His other hand was planted by her head, tangled in her hair as he braced himself. His blue eyes glared down at her. Some would have been intimidated to see the intensity of his gaze, but she had never been so happy to see him, to see anyone.

There was moisture on her cheeks, sopping into her hair. If the tears had been real the scream must have been too. She was trembling violently, her hands so tightly twisted into the sheets at her side that when she released them the muscles in her fingers ached.

"You done?" his voice was rough with sleep; she must have awoken him.

She nodded against his hand and he moved away from her quickly, sitting on the edge of the bunk. He sunk his head into his hands, running his fingers through his short hair. "Don't _do_ that. Shit, I thought it was Reavers or something." His hands shook a little as he composed himself.

"Can't help it. I'm sorry," she whispered, wiping the tears from her face with the sleeve of her dress.

"You're gonna have to. You can't be hollering every time you have a nightmare, not to mention thrashing around like you're having a gorram fit."

"No way to control REM sleep, images come unbidden," she shivered, wrapping her arms around herself and drawing her knees up to her chest.

"What the fuck was that anyway? What were you dreamin' on?" Jayne had heard screams like that before, it was the kind folks made when they knew they were about to meet their maker and couldn't do a damn thing about it. He'd never fought in the war, but he'd been on enough jobs that went south to hear it more than he cared to remember. Whatever triggered it was no run of the mill nightmare, he knew that much.

"Not relevant." She turned her head away from him, staring at the wall.

"Like hell it isn't," he snarled out. "You're half cocked, girl."

The tears returned anew and she rocked back and forth slightly, trying to control herself. The dream has been so vivid, so real, she had never doubted for a second that she had been back in the Academy. She closed her eyes briefly and the images returned instantly, drawn onto the inside of her eyelids. Opening them again she saw that he was still looking expectantly at her. "The needles," she managed to whimper.

"What needles? What're you talking about?"

She wouldn't explain, _couldn't_ explain. So she did the next best thing she could think of and took his hand, bringing it up to her forehead.

"What in the hell?" He started to pull back, but then he felt it there under his fingertips. A scar between her eyes the size of a pinhead. There was scar tissue beneath the surface too, like it'd been made more than once. He looked down at her, but she wouldn't meet his eyes. "Someone stuck a needle in your brain?" Why would anyone do that?

Instead of answering she moved his hand again until it rested on the back of her head. Sure enough there were more back there as he gently searched through her mess of hair; some were just more pinpricks but more than one was centimeters long.

"Who did this to you?" He'd seen a lot of shit in his day, but this was seriously fucked up. What kind of twisted fucker would do this to a girl?

"Hands of blue," she whispered and he understood now why she was always going on about them.

"Why?" That was the one thing he couldn't figure out. Awful lot of work to torture someone like that, but why would anyone mess with a brain that was already working?

"To make me perfect," she trailed off and tried closing her eyes again. The dream came up just as viciously and she had a terrifying notion that maybe she hadn't woken up after all. Maybe she really was back with the blue hands and had passed out from the needles. Maybe this was only a safe place that her mind had retreated to and reality was more experiments and more cutting. But through the horrific images she could still feel his hand as it cupped the back of her skull, grounding her to the present.

WIthout thinking of her actions she threw her arms around his neck, almost toppling them both off the bunk. She cried into his shoulder, burying her face into his shirt. It was scratchy against her skin and smelled like cheap detergent, his broad shoulders strong beneath her. He was breathing heavily underneath her, his chest rising and falling against her own in a reassuring rhythm. Her mind was so clouded that she could not even attempt to divine his feelings and she prayed he would not push her away. He felt so stable, so real, like a great anchor that kept her from drifting into darkness.

Jayne braced his hands flat on the mattress as she practically jumped on him, his feet resting on the ground. She was wailing away and damn if he didn't have a clue what to do. His life experiences did not include dealing with hysterical females; he'd done the best he could to stay away from them soon as he'd left home. Part of him wanted to shove her off of him onto the floor. Everyone had their demons, just 'cause hers were bigger than most didn't give him reason to comfort her.

Yeah, 'cause we've all had needles shoved inside our gorram heads, the other part of him thought snarkily. No wonder she was such a moonbrain. Poor kid.

Taken aback at his sympathy for his meal ticket he cleared those thoughts from his mind as best he could, angry at his moment of weakness. Jayne Cobb only felt bad for Jayne Cobb, always had and always would. Still, was plain what would calm her down and he couldn't have her all riled up.

Hesitantly he reached up and placed his hands on her back and it actually seemed to calm her a little. She was still crying alright, but the sobs no longer shook her whole frame like she was gonna fly to pieces. "You reckon you won't have those nightmares if I do this?"

She nodded against him, hoping that it was true. Anything but the nightmares.

With a disgruntled sigh he scooted back on the bed until he was leaning against the wall, the girl still clinging for all she was worth. He shifted her into his lap so she wasn't choking him quite so much and settled back, mentally crossing his fingers that he would wake up before anyone could see them like this. Things were rocky enough with Mal; this wouldn't do him any favors.

Suddenly missing that damn uncomfortable floor he closed his eyes as she continued to cry into his shoulder. This was gonna be a long night.


End file.
